When it comes to giving gifts, flowers, plus-ones, and other perks to your wedding party members, family members, and guests, it can be hard to remember all the right traditions and rules of etiquette to follow. Here are a few easy tips to help you remember who gets what at your wedding.

Who gets a plus-one?

The wedding etiquette on plus-ones is a bit tricky. Ultimately, it’s up to your discretion. If it’s within your budget to allow every guest to bring a date, then when you compile your guest list, you’ll have to assume that your head count will be twice that amount. Traditionally, in many families, anyone over the age of 16 is invited to bring a guest. When inviting couples, even if they are not married or living together, you may address the outer envelope to the persons house you are sending the invitation to and the inner envelope, (if you know both of their names, should include both names or and guest.  If you’re on a tight budget, you have every right to simplify your guest list. When considering whether or not to invite dates to a wedding, think about the comfort of your guests as well. Some guests may be the only single guests of their group of friends especially if they are older. Or you may have a group of fraternity brothers, who are all single and may have more fun attending without a guests. If you decide to keep to the traditional rules of etiquette, and invite a guests for all your single friends, you may want to consider having a casual conversation with some of your buddies before they receive the invitation, explain that you are on a tight budget and wanted to get an idea of what they were thinking as far as bringing a guest. Ultimately, you leave the final decision up to them, but many of your close friends may opt to attend your reception and have more fun attending the reception if they know they will have a lot of friends who will also be attending without dates.

Who gets corsages and boutonnieres? 


There are no strict rules of etiquette that dictate which individuals should be given corsages and boutonnieres. For grandparents, godparents or anyone that may be a part of the wedding ceremony (excluding the bridesmaids who generally carry a bouquet of fresh flowers) they may be expecting to receive a corsage. As a rule of thumb, if you give one grandparent a corsage you should give every grandparent a corsage or boutonniere. For groomsmen, there are some alternatives to the traditional boutonniere. Sometimes the groom may gift his wedding party a monogramed hanky in the color of the bridesmaids wedding dresses to place in their pockets as this is something they can keep and unlike the boutonnieres, they don’t have to worry about pinning them on, the flower dying in the heat of a outdoor summer wedding and such. The tradition of giving corsages and boutonnieres to wedding party members has less to do with who carries them and more to do with an ancient Greek belief that flowers would ward off evil spirits. Nowadays, it’s simply a lovely accent to your wedding party. Many modern couples give a single flower to their mothers, godmothers and special family members before the ceremony as corsages can be hard to pin on or a wrist corsage can get destroyed as they greet and hugs friends and family members throughout the day. A single flower is given as a sign of respect at the ceremony and can be placed in a vase at the reception at taken home at the end of the evening. For groom to everyone in their wedding party, every member of their (immediate or extended) family, their ushers, their ceremony readers, and any other honored guests. 

Who gets to sit with the bride and groom?

Traditionally the bridal party will be seated with the bride and groom at the reception with one long table often on risers that face the rest of the guest tables. Many couples are opting to instead be seated at a sweetheart table while the rest of the wedding party is seated with their spouse and family or close friends. The sweetheart table can include just the couple, or the best man and maid of honor and their significant other or even the parents of the bride and groom. WE see a moving trend toward couples choosing to sit with their immediate families because many times they may not live close to their families and want to spend as much time with them while they are together.  Depending on the age of your wedding party, a person standing in the wedding without his or her significant other may want the chance to connect with and sit with their family over dinner especially if they have been apart for the majority of the day with the bridal party. 

Who gets a personal table visit from the couple?


Well, in Indonesia, it is not uncommon for weddings to have upwards of 1,000 guests, all of whom are entitled to personal greetings from the bride and groom before the reception can begin. Finding time to greet each guest on your wedding day should be a piece of cake in comparison! However, depending on the type of reception and length of time you have for your reception, try this. Just after the wedding party has entered the reception and the guests are seated, the couple can take a moment to thank all those who came to witness and celebrate their wedding day from their mc’s microphone, letting them know that they would like to connect with each of them throughout the evening but if that is not possible, please know how much their presence means to the both of you. In addition, key in on greeting guests personally whom may be at your reception that you won’t have a chance to talk to at your rehearsal dinner, day after brunch or gift opening. Also, make a plan as a couple how you will greet each guest, and for how long. Make a pact to keep all guest greetings short and sweet so you can enjoy all the parts of  your reception. 

Who gets party favors?


Everyone! Hooray!